My Own Serendipity Story

THIS IS ANOTHER SERENDIPITOUS EVENT. There are two beautiful things I want to do in my entire life, and that’s to be a lifestyle worshipper and a wedding/kiddie event organizer/singer/host. 

Last March 1^st, Feast Bay Area Music Min Vocals were gathered to attend Bro George’s Worship Leading Meeting/Coaching. I wholeheartedly, undividedly listened on his words. I took down notes. I grinded the words he shared in my mind. I basked in his spirit and energy. And I must say, I felt anointed and empowered yet humbled.

Looking back, I remembered that I took a Strengths Finder exam in the office and I found out the Connectedness is my first strength.

According to the test, I can sense that every event is somehow the consequence of a series of actions, reactions, or lack of actions. I can accept that which cannot be fully explained using logic. I can say there are no accidents. I’m confident that things are linked together for a purpose that may or may not be revealed to me. It’s very likely that I hold tightly to my core values. Instinctively, I conclude that my life is more meaningful and I’m happier when I dedicate myself to something of importance to humankind. 

It can be something simple rather than something grand. I can sense my acts of kindness influence individuals to perform good deeds. I’m likely to inspire generosity in many people. By nature, I’m often the instrument in helping my teammates discover how they are linked to one another. I regularly remind them that their successes and failures are a direct result of their ability to work together.

My next strength is a Maximizer.

It defines me as I naturally figure out what makes most people unique or special. By nature, I exhibit a heightened awareness of my talents. One of my top priorities is building upon these natural abilities to create strengths. Instinctively, I realize I can determine what distinguishes each person from every other human being. 

I honor the special, the wondrous, and the rare qualities of people. I intentionally position them to attain ever higher levels of excellence. I can easily view things from someone else’s perspective even when I do not share their opinion. I deal with each individual on a personal level. I instinctively know what someone is feeling, based on the person’s words, deeds, silence, or body gestures.

The third one is being an Arranger.

It’s very likely that I’m acutely aware of how my teammates perceive my abilities. I can sense what they think of me as a person. These insights many times allow me to earn their confidence so I can contribute even more to the group’s success. Because of my strengths, I have been most productive in the past when someone in authority really took an interest in me. I likely to recall instances when they created opportunities for me to use my talents, knowledge, and skills. I often played the role of a teacher, coach, or mentor even when that was not my official title. Having a plan and knowing exactly what are required to do increases my chances of being successful. 

Understandably, I feel quite uncomfortable being assigned to a group that only manages crises, deals with the unexpected, or figures out tactics in the midst of chaos. Driven by my talents, I have a gift for recruiting people to work on tasks and special assignments. I probably know how to match talents to tasks, coordinate activities, and create schedules. Chances are good that I have a strong sense of commitment. It motivates me to make sure that things are carried through to completion even when difficulties arise.

Yes, I’m happy to know that those are my Top 3 strengths.

And I owe it to God who is absolutely faithful on His plan, surprisingly on the following day, March 2^nd, I received a text from my friend asking me to coordinate her wedding soon. 

I picked up my planner and started writing the date of her wedding. I know that it will be filled with details on the succeeding months.

I realized that God really likes me despite of my weaknesses, frailties, and limitations; knows me so well, even though I sometimes don’t understand His plan, and looks undoubtedly on my strengths even if there were discouragement in the past.

He’s my ultimate connector, maximizer, and arranger! He connects my every struggles and pain to reach my dreams. He maximizes every intricate and eccentric personality that I have to match with my skills and talents. He arranges my schedule, timing, and preparedness towards my life purpose. 

He asked me to fly! =)

His promise in Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose,” was revealed to me again!

And I praise His Name now and forever, for I can maximize the use of my 
Pen and Planner! :)

Surprise! Be functional! :)

--30--

SAY YES TO LIFE

There was this guy who told me before, “Get a life!”

I actually got choked and didn’t reply.

His words opened my heart and mind into a reality if I’m having a good life or not. To think that this guy came from the same faith community where I belonged before.

In retrospection, I was convinced that I was having a good kind of life. I had a supportive family, intelligent friends, humorous and faithful faith community friends, building houses for the poor, showcasing our talent, getting good grades, having a sort of an influence, had a colorful past and experiences which made me who I am right now. Maybe during that time he was pertaining to me about getting in or diving in a sort of like adventure. Maybe for him, living a comfortable life isn’t enough to say that you’re living a life to the fullest. I think he was being subjective in telling that to me. Anyway, his comment was thought provoking.

So here’s the list to say YES TO A BEAUTIFUL LIFE GOD HAS GIVEN US. A YES TO EVERY SEASON. A RESOUNDING YES TO WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW. Some maybe applicable and some may not to you and me. It really depends where we are right now. Say yes:

1.       To be a hero or heroine for someone or a group of people.

2.      To accept someone’s invitation for lunch or dinner.

3.      To sit down, relax, pray, and reflect upon God’s goodness in your life.

4.      To study and deepen your relationship with God.

5.      To sing in a videoke whole heartedly with friends and laugh like you’ve never laughed before.

6.      To write a thank you note to your loved ones.

7.      To hold a hand of your grandparents and whisper to them that they’re still beautiful and handsome despite of their age. (I hope I can return to this time while I can do this to my grannies.)

8.      To do scuba diving, mountain climbing, snorkeling, bunjee jumping and shout at the top of your lungs.

9.      To serve in your faith community or even do some mercy missions.

10.   To listen to someone’s story of defeat, victory, joy, upset, dreams and vision.

11.    To build true, deep, and awesome friendship.

12.   To kiss your mom or your dad on their cheek or forehead. (believe me, they’d melt when you do that.)

13.   To invite someone for a cup of coffee or just a chitchat.

14.   To show your care and on being a credible, efficient, and effective employee to your boss.

15.   To promotion and salary increase! J

16.   To be brave enough to stand up for your right and dignity as a person.

17.   To jog, exercise, and do some warm up stretching.

18.   To give a smile to a sad and down-trodden friend or officemate.

19.   To have an awesome photoshoot with friends.

20.  To the man of your dreams.

21.   To motherhood and fatherhood.

22.  To join a band, literary, dance, singing, art or any competition where you can enhance and challenge to the limit your talent.

23.  To open a business and to embrace financial literacy.

24.  To shout to the world you’re the awesomest person in the world. J

25.  To love yourself in the depths of your being.

26.  To believe in the power of your dreams and visions.

27.  To drive a car.

28.  To clean your house, cook a meal, and serve your family.

29.  To joke and play around, make silly face and tap your inner child again. J

30.  To read a novel, self-help book, or even comics. Be well-informed.

31.   To bounce back after reaching your breaking point.

32.  To improve your social skills, and on being charismatic.

33.  To clean as you go.

34.  To develop your good habits. Dress up. Work on your posture.

35.  To paint your future with different color hues.

36.  To never underestimate and downgrade the lowly people.

37.  To return to your old-fashioned values and restore them now.

38.  To confess your weaknesses.

39.  To ride a bike alone or with someone.

40. To fly a kite.

I believe that when we say yes to life, we say yes to Jesus. For that let’s encourage one another to create an awesome life now and as he said, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34

I think what’s more helpful is to take the time to reflect on our seasons and be deliberately aware of how God is moving in this time of our life. For only then do the seasons become more beautiful, purposeful, fruitful, meaningful, in our eyes.

Oh, lastly, when I see that guy again, and he'll tell me that same comment. I’ll reply in confidence, “I just didn’t get a life. I’m actually embracing it and loving it to the fullest. So I wish you do the same.” Then, I'll put a smile on my face.

Note: That guy I’m pertaining to was just an acquaintance. J

Mind to add some of your yes moments… J You may leave a comment below. Thanks.

Documentation of Inner Healing stream (KCON '11)

Inner Healing stream

Talk 1- Healing the wounded heart by Bro. Vic and Ditas Espanol

Bro. Vic and Sis. Ditas said that we all have emotional wounds, pains or limps. We focus on those  “seed events” of our emotional wounds and pains from the past. But the truth there is that God wants to heal our emotional wounds. There’s a bible verse about it which says, “But we all..are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory.” (2 Corinthians 3:18). We also have this emotional echo or sounds that control our lives. It keep us immobilize that causes us fearful. It tells, “What I’m feeling now is what I feel when I was young.” The challenge for us is to silence our emotional echo.  There are 3 emotional echoes such as fear, rejection and hopelessness. People have these tendencies to believe the echoes in our mind, but God doesn’t want us to continue listening to it. If we want to silence our echo, we need to change our beliefs of our painful pasts.

The greatest emotional echo is fear thus we must face our fears and trust God for us to deal with fear. The lie about fear is that we’re all alone. The truth about Fear is we are not alone! No matter what circumstances we have. God is faithful.  We can deal with our fear through: Facing it and trusting God.

Next emotional echo is rejection which means results of an imperfect love.  (Read Luke 8:28-30). What’s important is “Who we are in Jesus Christ.” Jesus is giving us new identity. Acknowledging the rejection, being thankful for the rejection, forgive those who rejected you and surround yourself with people who support you are simple ways to get healed.

 The last emotional echo is helplessness and the lie about it is, “I will never make it.” The truth is God is behind you, speaking your name. Our hope is in our faith for our Risen Christ.

Sis. Ditas also shared on how she went through a bad pregnancy. They turned to God for comfort. She also added that we can deal with helplessness through labeling your feelings, engaging in fun activities and challenge what you’re thinking.

Other verses to ponder upon: Jeremiah 33:6; John 10:10; 1Kings 19: 1-13; John 20: 11-13; John 20: 14-17

Talk 2- Healing the wounded identity by Bro. Earnest Tan

Bro. Earnest said that a wounding in our identity can influence the way we experience the world and distort the way we look at ourselves. Example: when we look at an ugly mirror. He also warned us to be careful with our wounded identity.

There are 3 areas of identity. First is our Self-Image, this is how we perceive our worth when it comes to our appearance- physical and social. It’s either we have a healthy or poor self-image. It’s also how we feel about our looks. He said that our original state is that “We are Special!” These are ways on how to heal and restore our original image, first is to affirm our birthright as God’s children, then reconcile with our limitations and lastly, accept and embrace our givens. We must believe that we are beautiful and we must be ourselves. He also shared his experience on how it was for him to build his self-image because he’s half-Filipino and Chinese. But he wants to act as a pure Filipino, but his tendency is to act Chinese. It somehow trimmed down the way he sees himself.

The next area is our Self-Confidence; this is how we perceive our worth when it comes to our abilities. Our original state must be, “We are Promise!” But by the grace of God, we can heal and restore our wounded confidence, first is to believe and discover our God-given potentials, next is to master our fears by doing baby steps and lastly by stretching beyond our comfort zones. (Read: John 15:16)

Sometimes, we learn to doubt our capabilities because our authorities put us down for our mistakes, failures and imperfections. He also shared that he grew up being compared with his brothers. Even in school, he was being bullied and looked down by his teachers, but by the Grace of God, he blooms.

 Last area of our identity is our Self-Esteem, it is how we perceive our worth when it comes to our ability to love and be loved. Our original state must be, “We are Loved!” We must enjoy the love from people and we must make sure that we work on our love-ability.  (Read: Is. 43: 1,4) We are damaged because we are being abandoned, rejected, and loved with conditions.

He also shared a story about a Chinese mother who has a daughter, who always asks her if she loves her. The reason why the daughter is not secured with her mother’s love is because when she was young, her mom attempted to abort her thrice.

He concluded that Love is freely given. This must be the most important thing to work out for us to heal and restore our wounded identity. These are the ways to get healed, first is to trust in your Love-ability, next is to welcome opportunities to give and receive love and finally, we must experience unconditional and believe that, “I am Lovable!” We must shine as we are meant to be! We are a seed of love.

 “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of a Course in Miracles

The truth is:”If you don’t love yourself, you won’t love anyone else, including God.”- Fr. John Powell

Talk 3: Healing the Wounded Family by Fr. Larry Tan

Fr. Larry Tan started the talk by asking everyone to join in the singing of the song Welcome to the Family, after which he stressed out that family is the most important relationship we’ll ever have. According to him, we may be successful in our career, but failure in our family puts everything to waste. Sadly, such is the case involving many people today—experiencing dysfunctional families, divorce, separation, and such issues as sibling rivalry. It’s the work of Diablo which means divider to separate us from our family.

Fr. Tan said that families today are under attack, and many of the problems that people face now are family related. But, the good news is that whether we want our family to be heaven or hell, it is UP TO US.

He compared the family to the World Trade Center, which took years to build but only took minutes to bring down to Ground Zero. Similarly, a family takes years to build, yet it only takes one mistake to destroy it. This said, we all have to work hard for our family. We should not just let things happen, but we must make them happen. No more time for lip service, but to do an action. There is a lot of imperfection in our family, but love is a risk relationship.

We want a strong family. Every man, woman, and child wants a harmonious and happy family but our reality says a different way. There are many factors that influences and controls our lives such as peer, media, school, society, church, boss and nuns. We are complex people and we are a product of other people and family.

Fr. Tan enumerated the different blocks to a loving family: criticism, hostility, disrespect, control, suspicion, fighting, indifference, and selfishness. The good news is that there are also different helps to achieve a loving family, which he enumerated: praise, acceptance, forgiveness, giving, joy, listening, trust, and respect. He also mentioned one big secret for a loving family, which is loving and reaching out 100%.

He reminded everyone of the truth that the person we love most will likely be the one to hurt us the most. But, instead of choosing between the option to fight and to avoid, he said that the best option is forgiveness or forbearance. The root of hurt is a lack of love, and the secret to healing is to HEAL (Have Enormous Amount of Love). Whatever the hurt, fill it up with love. Fr. Tan said that we have the power, and it all depends on us. We can love one another and let love’s work… begin. (Read: Eph. 6:1-3)

Talk 4: Forgiveness by Ilsa Reyes

According to Ilsa Reyes, forgiveness is the key to healing. She said that what defiles is not what’s outside, but what’s inside. Then, she asked these questions to her audience: is your anger destroying your life? Is it robbing you of your peace and your joy? Are you letting it keep you from experiencing the life God intended you to have?

Ilsa said that nursing anger can have various effects. One, it can make the body sick.

(Read: Sirach 27: 30, 28:1) Unforgiveness can cause emotional distress, and medical studies show that it causes the production of inflammatory hormones that can harm organs. And what’s interesting–—the mere act of forgiveness relieves this. And two, nursing anger can destroy the soul. When we are angry, we can either let go of the anger or feed it and hold onto it forever. But, we have many reasons to forgive.

First, because God, in His great love and wisdom, asks us to. All of us have sinned, so we have no right to say that “I cannot forgive others because I am perfect.” (Read: Mat. 6: 14-15) When we build community, we must accept the weaknesses and differences, and recognize the woundedness, in others. God became God of our last resort, but later realize that we can ran to Him immediately. (Read: Sirach 28: 2-4,6) Second, because it is good everyone of us, for you and me—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. (Read: Heb. 13: 5-6) Forgiveness helps us embrace the truth that our source of self-worth is God. If we don’t forgive and let go of our anger, we’re saying that we’re powerless, and we therefore block the grace of God. Third, because it brings harmony to our relationships with other people. If we fail to forgive, the anger that we nurture will destroy our other relationships. Fourth, it is an opportunity to release the offender from bondage and bring him closer to God. When we forgive someone, the person who receives it can share it to others, and so we can bring so many closer to God. And fifth, so society can be more peaceful. When we forgive, we end the cycle of hatred.

Ilsa also mentioned some salient points about forgiveness. One, it is an act of the will—feelings may follow later. Two, it is divine. We need prayer, and we need God’s grace, in order to be able to forgive. Three, it is a process, so it takes time. We must let God be in the center of that process. Four, we need others’ help. We need competent and caring people, people that we trust. Five, if we can’t do it face to face, then maybe vicarious or even long distance. And six, we need to forgive God and ourselves too.

So how do we forgive? Ilsa shared this prayer: “By the love of the Father, in the name of Jesus, with the power of the Holy spirit, I forgive you (name of the person) for (reason).” She recommended praying the said prayer three times a day. It can also be used when asking for forgiveness.

According to Ilsa, a healing journal may help in the process of healing and forgiveness. And, we will know when we have already forgiven if we are able to think of the person without bitterness, resentment, and anger. We may not forget the experience, but we forget the pain.

Ilsa enumerated five dominant emotions in the forgiveness process. One is denial, a stage when we don’t admit that we are hurt. Two is anger, when we blame the other person for hurting and destroying us. Three is bargaining, when we set up conditions to be fulfilled before we’re ready to forgive. Four is depression, when we blame ourselves for letting hurt destroy us. And fifth is acceptance, when we already look forward to growth from our hurt.

She said that forgiving oneself is also crucial for healing. When we forgive ourselves, we must accept that we are vulnerable and allow ourselves to be humans. Forgiveness sets us free.

To end her talk, Ilsa led the reading of a passage telling of Jesus inviting us not to hold on to our anger.